durational:

people complain about auto correct but it’s helpful 99% of the titties 

(via caligirlwannabe)

blessthebutt:

my favorite flavor of cake is more

(Source: asscop, via fake-mermaid)

lamapalooza:

this is your captain speaking, AND THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SHOUTING.

(Source: lamapalooza, via orgasm)

" It’s all about falling in love with yourself and sharing that love with someone who appreciates you, rather than looking for love to compensate for a self love deficit. "

proctalgia:

i love when dogs sigh. its like, hey bud, long day at the office?

(Source: proctalgia, via fireworks-of-the-sea)

" Saturdays are for adventure; Sundays are for cuddling "

plot twist: i actually died many years ago this is just a queue 

(Source: plazm, via orgasm)

roavaswardrobe:

assvvipe:

summer lovin
had me a blast
summer lovin
dick in my ass

image

image

(Source: roughness, via orgasm)

lmaoalien:

i am the human version of the first piece of bread

(via fake-mermaid)